Truth in Love

Sometimes we avoid speaking the truth for fear of offending someone and causing them pain or hurt. Sometimes when we decide to speak the truth we do it without any love. Either of this is wrong and is detrimental to a relationship. We are exhorted to speak the truth of God in love and both the elements are equally important.
Ephesians 4:15,16
Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into him who is the Head, that is, Christ. From him the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work.
The reason we are exhorted to speak the truth in love is because we belong to one another in Christ, we are part of the same body. Not speaking in truth is deception.

How can we speak to one another God's truth in love? Here are some aspects of how this can be achieved. Paul had to do this with the church he established in Thessalonica and we can learn some principles from Paul's approach in dealing with the problems the church faced.

In 1 Thessalonians chapter 1 Paul spoke words of affirmation. He praised them for their faithfulness to the gospel even though they were Christians for a short time. We need to affirm people, because God does not condemn anyone.

Then Paul told them of the relationship he shared with them in 1 Thessalonians chapter 2. Paul emphasized that he cared for them and that they had a relationship like a father to a child. Often if we do not have a relationship with the person, we do not earn the right to speak into their lives and we will look like we are interfering.

Once Paul had affirmed the Thessalonicans and emphasized the relationship they shared, he then went on in the subsequent chapters to tell them the truth - warning and admonishing them on the basis of their relationship. After he had this, he finally ends with encouragement to walk in the truth of God.
1 Thessalonians 5:11-15
Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing. Now we ask you, brothers, to respect those who work hard among you, who are over you in the Lord and who admonish you. Hold them in the highest regard in love because of their work. Live in peace with each other. And we urge you, brothers, warn those who are idle, encourage the timid, help the weak, be patient with everyone. Make sure that nobody pays back wrong for wrong, but always try to be kind to each other and to everyone else.

No one embodies speaking the truth in love more than Jesus. To the women caught in adultery, Jesus called out the truth of the woman's sin but treated the woman with love and compassion and encourages her to leave her of sin.

John 8: 7-11

When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, “Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.” Again he stooped down and wrote on the ground.

At this, those who heard began to go away one at a time, the older ones first, until only Jesus was left, with the woman still standing there. Jesus straightened up and asked her, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?”

“No one, sir,” she said.

“Then neither do I condemn you,” Jesus declared. “Go now and leave your life of sin.”

How do you communicate to others? Are you speaking the truth without love or are you avoiding to speak the truth thinking that it is love? Analyse your motive, is it to build and encourage one another in love? Let us, with the help of God, speak the truth and always in love because love is the heart of all relationships!